Whilst researching empathy and social connection for my dissertation (of which I will certainly share parts with you soon!) I kept stumbling across this same method - Loving-Kindness Meditation. A Buddhist mindfulness technique to spread compassion and refocus the mind on selfless love. Of course as any good researcher would I took a first-hand approach at discovering the truth and value behind this technique. Any one who knows me well will know that despite my hippie-dippie style and Buddhist beliefs I struggle with meditation - I have the knees and back of a 60 year old and a rather high spirit which is better grounded with dance meditation than still practices. However, I relish new ideas and have written below my own explanation and thoughtfulness on the process as tested by me, using the led-meditation audio clips on the site quoted below (- I would always recommend such led-practices for newbies and it certainly supported me). A quick description...Loving-kindness or Metta Bhavana is a meditation practice taught by the Buddha to develop the mental habit of selfless or altruistic love. Metta Bhavana literally meaning, in the Pali language, (Metta) 'love' (in a non-romantic sense such as friendliness or kindness), (Bhavana) 'Cultivation'. So 'Love Cultivation'. ~ Beautiful enough to make you want to try it from the title alone huh? It is a 'heart-meditation' that does aim to affect your daily life - to increase your compassion and openness whilst diminishing judgement and discrimination. The process is traditionally a still meditation that tends to cultivate in a series of steps, developing from your inner circle of care to your adversaries and eventually to all the sentient beings of the World. It is a way of crossing borders of disagreement and judgement, distance and situation. The steps...1. Think of yourself, smiling, light moving into your heart. Forgive yourself, love yourself. "May you be well and happy." 2. Think of a friend, smiling, light moving from your heart to theirs.Think of why you like them, send love to them. "May he/she be well and happy." 3. Think of a neutral person, you may see them around but hold no feeling towards them. Think of their humanity, cultivate a feeling, send love to them. "May they be well and happy." 4. Think of an 'enemy', one you have a disagreement with. Forgive them, focus on their qualities, send love to them. "May they be well and happy." 5. Think of all 4 together, yourself, friend, neutral and enemy. Sharing light and receiving equal love. "May we be well and happy." 6. Think further, to those in the building, the city, the country. Share the light and love further still, to all beings across the world, human and animal. "May they all be well and happy." My thoughts...I am known to be loving. Sometimes overly so. It confuses people. In this day and age love is a misunderstood word; but the Buddhist Metta Bhavana puts it into its correct perspective. Strange however loving you are thought to be the struggle one faces to focus, train and accept this metta. To see yourself without today's multi-million dollar trend of flaw-focussing. To give yourself time and realise that you are human and so are 'they' - the friend, the neutral and the 'enemy'. To see your adversary and release those pent up arguments - the stored hostility and barriers built up in some strange self-harming strategy of safety. To release yourself from societal built barriers and allow the mind to transcend beyond the minuscule number of known individuals to the entire world, the entire universe, surrounded by your loving-kindness. A golden ball of warmth and respect encircling all of life and just because of you; because you gave it the time. Perhaps it is nothing. Perhaps you are simply sitting in an over-flexible position that you'll probably later regret and imagining: Creating a fantasy of infinite proportions that is forever beyond reach. And yet. If you go out tomorrow and encounter that 'neutral' and feel a smile spread across your face - an involuntary symptom - and subsequently receive one in return - a simple biological response displaying the work of in-built mirror neurons within the brain - has the world not already become a little kinder? When you stumble into the 'enemy' and forget to replay your recent indiscretions through your mind before greeting them, will you not be more loving and therefore likely fix some small difficulty between you. Will these tiny things not ripple through the ocean of beings in the world and change things? Is a ripple in a pond truly inconsequential, swallowed up by the overarching volume? No, I think not. How can any energy scientifically go to waste - it must move, transform. Nothing is without consequence whether noticeable or not, all is Karma. And so we come to conclude that anything done with pure and good intentions is worthwhile. And there can be no rationalising to discourage such positive attempts or indeed the quality of such 'alternative' methods. No? Further reading...If you want to research this and other methods of Buddhist practice, firstly good for you! And secondly here is a couple of sites I found useful and accessible teachings:
https://thebuddhistcentre.com/text/loving-kindness-meditation http://www.buddhanet.net/e-learning/loving-kindness.htm The audio I used for my meditation was from: http://www.freebuddhistaudio.com/audio/details?num=M11B
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